Askin’ the crew
May 4, 2008 by Red
I threw out my back the other day, while moving something at someone’s house. They had asked me to do it since they weren’t in town and it was in dire need to be moved as soon as possible. I gladly did it, but I’ve been feeling it ever since.
You know you’re in pain when you sit at the table and cry into your dinner because the pain is so intense, but yet, you can’t sit anywhere else because it’s much more painful elsewhere.
I still can’t get around too well, and I’m running low on Loritabs. I would looove to see a doc about it and get another round of pills, but I don’t have insurance and just seeing the doc would put me back close to a hundred bones. And that’s not even counting the drugs.
Is it wrong to ask the folks to cough up some moolah since I was doing something for them? They sure as hell haven’t offered, but I sure as hell wouldn’t be hurting if I had stayed home that day.
Thoughts?
I don’t know if I would… depends on how close to them you are. It may just ruin a good friendship or put strain on the relationship.
I do think you should let them know how badly you are hurting and let them know your thinking of seeing a doctor. Then see if they offer on their own.
Just my opinion.
It’s my inlaws. Close? Eh, no .. but family, nonetheless.
They know I’m hurt, but have only apologized.
Red
I hate to say it, but I think your brought it upon yourself.
You could have said no. You were being nice and got hurt. I’m with SkyWindows on letting them know, but I wouldn’t hold my breath. Since they’re the inlaws I wouldn’t see a problem with your hubby putting in an extra word for ya, but still, I wouldn’t hold me breath.
I too have a weak back prone to the occasional ouchie, and it’s for this reason that I avoid such tasks. If it were an on the job injury, that would be a completely different thing, but being a favor, you can’t expect something in return for a favor, even if what you expect doesn’t seem like too much. It’s the law of the favor. Sorry.
I hope you get to feeling better soon. Oddly enough my back is giving me grief too, but mine is because of something stupid I did. No one to turn to in my case.
Take care and good luck.
Thanks, MrParkour.
I know I coulda said no . . but Im one that wants to help, ya know. And Im not going around crying that they should or need to, Im just asking what yall think. They know I’m hurt, Im not “expecting” them to do anything about . . But I guess just out of principle, it woulda been nice if they did offer, ya know. *shrugs*
Red
I just ran this by the wife and she WOULD expect them to help out, since they were the ones that asked you for the favor. I’m still sticking by my stance, but I thought you might like another opinion.
I would offer if someone did somehting for me, and they in turn got hurt.
THanks for the wifey’s opinion!
Red
Well, they ARE your in-laws. I know if it was my daughter-in-law and the situation was the same, then I would think it was my thing to help her out.
It’s all in the way you say it, I think, and if they actually have the bucks to part with.
Back pain sucks donkey ass. I’ve had to crawl to my car to get to the chiropractor.
Wish I could help!
Yep, Ive done the crawl too
It does sucks, and I’ll get over it . . just thinking out loud with this post, I suppose.
Red
I’m sorry your hurt Red, there’s nothing as bad as being in pain.
I guess the thing that strikes me the most, is to have to suffer through pain because you can’t go seek medical attention. We might complain about public health care here in Canada, but all I have to do is make an appointment and show my Government Healthcare card whenever I feel the need to see a doctor.
Even before I came to Canada from a system that had private health care, my father always stressed the need for insurance. He always grumbled about how the premiums were going to ruin us, but insurance had to be paid.
I now work for an Emergency Assistance company, and I’ve seen too many people go completely broke because they didn’t feel they need
ed Travel insurance. Yes, I know, that doesn’t happen to everyone. But it for sure won’t happen to me or my family.
Going back to an earlier post of yours, I guess that’s where I’d have my tax refund go towards: insurance.
Hope you feel better soon.
Re in-laws. I’d come out and ask them for help. Not because they owe me (because they don’t), not because it’s their fault (because it isn’t). But because I’m in pain and can’t get better without help.
And I wouldn’t be expecting anything. Because it’s not fair towards them having to pay for my medical needs. Having said that, I have the right to ask for help, just as they have the right to deny it.
I do suffer because I dont see a doc on a regular basis. Truthfully, I havent been to a doc in years. I cant afford it. but I also cant afford insurance, and Im not able to get a medical card because Im not on welfare and/or pregnant. So I suffer. I do see my chiropractor on occasion because he knows of my situation and he’ll set me up for 20 bucks (that’s what it’d cost if i did have insurance). That’s the main thing that sucks about not working fulltime. No insurance, and no way of getting it.
Im not going to ask them for help. I believe that if they wanted to help, they would have already offered to.
Red
Red, a massage therapist would set you back about $65 dollars for an hour. They seem to find it challenging when you tell them that you’ve messed up your back, and it almost always has worked for me. Just a suggestion.
Ive tried that route, and it is so incredibly painful for me that I cant lie there and get anything out of it. My back is so messed up that touching it just the right way brings on gator tears .. and i can tolerate pain with the best of ‘em.
Red
Wow - good question. I think I wouldn’t feel bad asking them if it was something THEY did to me to have caused the pain. But I think I’d feel awkward asking in this case just because it seems like it was just one of those freak things that happens or maybe because I took on too much. I’m not saying I’m right or wrong, it’s just my feelings on the matter and a matter of what I’m comfortable with.
I do hope you can find a way to feel better soon. Back pain makes life horrible. Oh, and be glad you aren’t in my state where it is now illegal to not have health insurance. How crazy stupid is that?
Illegal? Do you go to jail or get kicked outta the country if you dont have insurance? Weird!
hahah, and yes, it would be very awkward to ask them because they aren’t too fond of me anyway.
Red
What’s the harm in saying to them, “My back is a wreck and I just don’t have the cash right now to get it checked out. Can you guys help us out? I”m in excruciating pain I’d be so grateful!” and if they can’t they can’t - no harm no foul. It’s not like they are acquaintances or friends - they are family. You can ALWAYS approach FAMILY like that, it’s family law. Heee-heee-hee!
I’d also put out the “feelers” and ask everyone within ear shot if they had some extra muscle relaxers
Shooot, you can ALWAYS find a buddy that has a little stock pile. Wish you lived near me, I’d help a sister out. SHOOOoooooooot! THat’s what friends are for 
No, it wouldn’t hurt to ask .. but Im better off not, ya know. Like I told Teeni, they dont like me anyhow
They might be family but they’re weird family .. Hard to explain, but they’re not the type to ask of favors .. they can ask, but you cant .. know what I mean.
Red
Hah! Whatta bunch of responses .. remind me not to post while high.
Hugs to ya… I wish I had some pain pills I could ship to ya.
Thanks . Im a bit better today .. was able to actually dooo something around here!
Red